Stand and Speak (And Fight the Fights That Need Fighting)
by HarmonyLover
Summary: After her press briefing, C. J. finds Toby waiting in her office. Fill-in for 3x10, "The Women of Qumar."


**Disclaimer:** I own nothing belonging to _The West Wing_ ; it all belongs to NBC, Aaron Sorkin, et al. I write these stories purely for enjoyment; no copyright infringement is intended.

 **Author's note:** The subtitle is a reference to _The American President_ , another wonderful Sorkin creation, and a line that Martin Sheen, as Chief of Staff, says to Michael Douglas, who plays the president. And if anyone in this fandom has not read Dipenates' wonderful "Arguing About Earthquakes," I cannot recommend it enough. Still the best fic dealing with "Women of Qumar" that I've ever read.

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 **Stand and Speak**

 **(And Fight the Fights That Need Fighting)**

After her press briefing, C. J. returned to her office to find Toby waiting for her.

She had seen his little gesture in the back of the room, and had found herself forcibly holding back tears for the second time in five minutes as she plastered on a smile and talked to the press corps. It had meant quite a lot to her, actually, that he had bothered to do that, given how angry she had been at him earlier.

But she was still exhausted and her heart was raw, and she wasn't sure she wanted to hear whatever it was he had come to say.

"What did you need, Toby?" she sighed, sitting in her desk chair and kicking off her heels.

"Well, first of all, I wanted to say thank you," Toby replied in his soft-spoken way. "You did very well in there tonight, and we needed that. I know it wasn't easy for you."

"No, it wasn't," C. J. said sharply. "But it's my job, so … "

"And you did it well. I'm saying thank you."

"You're welcome," C. J. said, her tone softening a little. "Thank you for … what you did at the back. I needed that."

"That's why I came, actually," Toby said, sitting on the couch. He clasped his hands together awkwardly as he tried to phrase his question. "C. J., is there … some reason other than the obvious why this deal with Qumar upsets you so much?"

"'The obvious' being that Qumar treats women like breeding slaves rather than people?" C. J. retorted, her anger and bitterness returning full force.

"Yeah."

"No, Toby. I wasn't raped, or assaulted, or locked in my house as a kid because I was female. I'm fortunate enough to live in a country where, even though we can hand out misogyny with the best of them, women are at least free to have an education, a job, and a paycheck, and basic little things like birth control. Which is more than I can say for any of the women in Qumar."

"C. J.," Toby said hesitantly, "you know that every person here agrees with you in principle."

"Oh, really?" C. J. snapped, getting up from her chair so that she could pace away her frustration. "And what good did that do me today, Toby? I'm the only female member of the senior staff, and I spent the day talking to you, to Leo, to Nancy McNally, to anyone who would listen, about the fact that we are selling military weapons to a country that commits human rights abuses against women on a daily basis. To a country that has institutionalized female abuse to such a degree that their women can't even fathom what it would be like to have their own life and make their own decisions - some of them can't even imagine what it would be like to step out of the house without permission! And yet we renew our contract for the air base because it's _convenient_. "

She paused for breath, her shoulders heaving. "I was _ignored_. As those women are ignored. Because women aren't important enough to this country to defend."

"That's not true," Toby refuted quietly.

"Isn't it?" C. J. said fiercely. "It's hypocrisy, Toby, of the most insidious kind. We preach about freedom for all, freedom from oppression, freedom from exploitation, gender equality, and then we sell arms and give money to a country that violates all of those things in the worst way possible. I pointed that out to _everyone_ today, and no one did _anything_! We're willing to help destroy the lives of thousands of women for an air base, Toby. An _air base_ , when we have two other ones nearby that are perfectly serviceable. Forgive me if I'm feeling like my country doesn't really care about my welfare."

Toby sighed. "Nancy's right, you know. Everybody's got guns, and we're doing the best we can."

"Yeah, well, today our best was pretty pathetic," C. J. snapped.

"Yes, it was," Toby acknowledged. "You're right. You _are_ right, Claudia Jean. We all know that. But we can't take on the entire Department of Defense on this issue right now, and God knows they're not exactly paragons of virtue when it comes to sexism and abuse of women, either."

C. J. wilted. She sighed heavily and sank next to Toby on the couch.

"We should be standing up for them," she whispered. "We should be standing up for them, and we're sacrificing them. For nothing."

Toby put an arm around her shoulders. "You are an extraordinary woman, C. J. We have to pick our battles, but you are here fighting for those women, and speaking for them, those women who have no voices. We just haven't gotten there yet. We will. One battle at a time."

C. J. shook her head, letting it fall onto Toby's shoulder. "We can't fight them fast enough."


End file.
